NUMBER 10!!!!

For those who care I have officially made it to workout #10!!! It took longer than it should have and I had to stop and get my courage back up for a week before I finished that last one. Do I see any results? I don't know, but I'll tell you I started bawling during the cooldown.

Why?

1. It was HARD!
2. It IS hard!
3. It's going to be hard for a while.
4. I can't believe I let myself slide for so long.
5. I realize I can do it.
6. I'm not alone (A BIG thank you to Cynthia and also to all my sisters who inspire me by working out and giving me words of encouragement).
7. I'm sure I was releasing evil chemicals I've stored up in my fat, which is continuing to burn off as I type.
8. I was thinking of my kids as babies ... and what does that have to do with working out? mMm ... shrugging my shoulders.
9. Some things in life are so doggone hard, not just working out.

And the final reason for my bawling, and also in honor of the 10th workout ... drumroll please ...

10. I'm a WOMAN and I CAN!!!

All-in-all, I feel much better now. I will continue working out and even if it's very slow I know I'll also continue to receive encouragement from those who love me. And hopefully eventually I will look and feel better and better.

THANK YOU!!!

So happy to be a mommy

I don't know, maybe I need therapy, but I LOVE when my kids call me mommy. Even better is when they call me 'mama'. Granted they are 5 and 3, so it's still socially acceptable. I always planned and wanted to be a mother. It didn't happen for me until I was 32-years-old. I wasn't sure at times if it would ever happen. They call me 'mama' when they're in that blissfully happy state and loving me with all their hearts. I'm sure they also love me when they say 'I don't love you,' but it doesn't have the same ring as 'mama'.

Mother's Day was a great day. Here are some highlights:

Preston's Hand Print

I miss you when we're not together

I'm growing up so fast

See how big I've gotten

Since you saw me last?

As I grow, I'll change a lot,

The years will fly right by.

You'll wonder how I grew so quick

When and where and why?

So look upon this hand print

That's hanging on your wall.

And memories will come back of me,

When I was very small.

All About Mom, by Paige:

• Favorite Color - Purple
• Favorite Food - Salad with tomatoes & cheese
• Favorite Flower - purple ones because they smell real good
• My Mom has blue eyes & brown hair
• My Mom is 88 (maybe) years old
• My Mom loves to type on the computer & play with us
• My Mom is happiest when we come give her loves & paper hearts
• I love my Mom because she makes me pancakes and lays with me and plays games with me

And let's not forget gifts from my sweetheart. I won't tell you what he wrote (cause that's personal), but Paige graciously drew and colored this card for dad with her favorite animal. I love when the kids color pictures for me. And I love getting cards from my hubby. He writes nice things about me.

And my gift? Why, these nice carpets, of course. I have never liked having black carpet in the kitchen. These are much more hip and don't show every speck that lands on them. Thanks hot-diggity-Doug. And a big THANK YOU to my beautiful model as well.

A Headache

Paige has been ill this week. Last night she had a bad headache and Preston thought it would be fun to play with his trains, clanking them together joyfully. I was in a quandary. Both of the kids wanted to be with me. Preston wanted to watch Bolt, but Paige didn't want it on in my room (where she was lying on the bed in agony). Paige wanted me to be with her. I couldn't put Bolt on in either room and have both kids be satisfied. I ended up turning on Bolt in the other room. Preston watched it for a minute and wandered back in my room banging his popper on the floor (you know those things kids push around with a blue handle and popping balls - very LOUD). I took it from him and put it up high in the closet.

Me: "Do you even know how to be quiet? Paige has a very bad headache."
Preston: I have a bad head egg too.
Me: Did you say head egg?
Preston: Yeah, I have a bad head egg because Paige was screaming at me yesterday.
Me: Laughing.
Paige: Laughing.

So it's all good. We're all in the same room. Paige is laughing now and Preston said his peace. We spent the remainder of the night in the same room together. I rubbed Paige's head for a while. Preston laid down on me and fell asleep. Isn't that what motherhood is all about?

And by the way, Paige is feeling much better today. Thanks to those of you who prayed for her.

I do my own shots, thank you

I took a few pictures of Paige after her photo shoot the other day. I love these pictures. She has been ill this week and it makes me sad to see her in pain. I hope she recovers quickly and gets back to being the vivacious and energetic girl we are used to. She is being brave and patient. And so you aren't too worried, she has a fever and a very bad sore throat. She's been lying around and barely eating. I just think she is so beautiful, inside and out, even when she's ill. I couldn't ask for a better daughter.

Kid stuff

Paige and Preston have a lot of fun together most every day. Of course, Preston is rough and Paige is usually more gentle. But they have fun anyway in between occasional bloody noses. I like to sit on the couch sometimes and watch them play. They did a show for me recently that they called The Funny Show. Paige stood in the middle of the room with a pillow and swung it like a bat at Preston as he came running at her. They did it over and over. And yes, it was funny.You may remember me saying in another post that Paige likes dressing me in something similar to what she's wearing. The other day we were going out and I noticed Paige had tried to dress Preston similar to her. She was in pink pants and a long sleeved pink shirt. She put Preston in blue pants (jeans) and a blue long sleeved shirt. Also, you may or may not know that the yellow blanket Paige is holding is very special to her. It has a silky edge that she rubs on her lip for comfort. She's done this since she was a baby. Her yellow blanket is never left behind. Notice Preston has a blue blanket? He goes along with most things Paige wants to do and is dutifully holding his blanket so he can 'be like Paige.' I thought that was too cute!With one of the recent storms the kids gathered up their boots, coats and gloves and ran outside to play. Unfortunately, we only found 3 boots and Preston got on the first pair. Paige ran around frantically trying to find the last boot to no avail. Preston ran around having a ball waiting for Paige to come out.

Problem solved. Luckily dad has a pair of boots. And not to worry about gloves. She solved that problem as well. Kids are so adaptable.

"Mom's don't learn anything"

Preston can be quite a handful. Lately he likes to throw things when he gets mad. I've been working with him on it. I'll see him get mad and immediately look around for something he can throw to show his displeasure in a physical way. Today at church he got mad at Paige. He already had one of her stuffed bunnies in his hand. He drew his hand back and I tried to stop him just as he lobbed the bunny straight at the lady sitting behind us. I thought she must have had boys of her own because she made a perfect catch. It took Preston about 15 minutes of coaxing and a motivational pinch to apologize to her.

After church I was asking the kids what they learned in class. Paige learned about the Word of Wisdom. Preston learned about the church building. Doug asked what mom learned in church and Preston said all emphatically (as if it was absurd), "Mom's don't learn anything." I asked him what mom's do while they're at church and he responded, "They pray for help."

That's right, Preston. I pray for help because I need all the help I can get. And I sing a hymn or two.

Electricity and saucers?

I was just about finished doing my make-up this morning when our electricity went out. The kids thought it was fun to get the plug-in flashlights out of the wall to finish our preparations. BTW, they worked wonderfully. To get out of the garage I had to open the garage door manually. This upset Paige a bit and she said, "My gosh! We need electricity for everything. We need it to open the garage door and on a cold winter day to have light for reading a book!"

Also, the other day we were wrestling with the kids and tickling them, which they love. We call the kids nonsense names to make them laugh. I said, "Paige is a little saucer." She sat there thinking for a minute and said, "Barbecue saucer?" It's all nonsense, but she sure has good comebacks without even trying.